Shows that cannot possibly be real: Part 1 of an indefinitely numbered series - Cash Cab

This concept was originally meant to be one mega-post, but as I came up with more ideas, I thought it would fare better split into an indefinite amount of segments. If anyone was actually printing out posts and reading them on the toilet, I'd be so genuinely flattered that I'll personally put together a mega-post for you and print it out on toilet paper so you can read and wipe your ass with it.

ANYWAY, this series of posts (not necessarily consecutively) will examine TV shows that cannot possibly be real, or have glaring flaws in their realness. Today's show is Cash Cab.

If you haven't seen it, Cash Cab follows an "actual New York City cab" picking up "real passengers" going to "real places". During the ride, the driver asks them trivia questions. If they don't know they answer, they have two "shout-outs", one via cell phone and one to a "random" person on the street. At the end of the ride they get a big wad of cash and are released into the New York City streets.

Where to begin? First of all the cab really is painted exactly like a NYC cab and even has the number thing on top (# 1G12, and it's a minivan). It also wouldn't be a ridiculous promotion for the city, so I can see them allowing it. Not a huge flaw there.

Now there is the ride itself. Finding someone looking for a cab isn't a problem, but the flaws with the rides are four-fold:

1. Every ride on cash cab is perfectly timed. The driver always knows exactly when to change rounds or increase cash values, so people get relatively the same amount of questions. But how could this many random cab rides all be the exact same length with all the outside factors such as distance of trip, lights, traffic, etc.
2. Anyone who's been in a New York City cab knows that they drive - to put it lightly - "erratically". But Mr. Cash-Cab-Bald-Driver-Guy has no problem negotiating New York City traffic while simultaneously joking around and hosting a game show in his car, not to mention taking people to their "destinations".
3. Regarding the "shout outs", while a mobile shout out is plausible (no different than phoning a friend on "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire", the street shout outs are harder to believe. If I learned anything from "Borat" (surprisingly I learned more from that movie than a summer living in NYC), it's that people in New York City don't like to be approached my strangers. So to think that this cab just pulls over while some jackass passenger yells at someone on the sidewalk to help them with a trivia question without being shunned or held up at gunpoint is just not realistic.
4. The most ridiculous - and my favorite part - of Cash Cab is that with each question you answer incorrectly you get a strike, and three strikes gets you eliminated from the game. And not only do you not win money, but Mr. Cash-Cab-Bald-Driver-Guy pulls over and throws you out of the cab no matter where you are. Could you imagine this possibly happening in reality? Is it even legal? What if you're going from Manhattan to Yankee Stadium, lose the game, and get dumped in Harlem (or any neighborhood around the stadium). Or what if you actually have a legitimate place to be at a certain time and get left on the street because you don't know the atomic number of rubidium (37). What will you tell your angry boss/friends?

It is for those reasons (and more I probably forgot at this point, I've been working on this post for a few weeks now) that there is no way Cash Cab can possibly be real. Nonetheless, the next time I'm in New York City I'm gonna do my best to find that bastard and hail it down, because I'm broke.